Help Wanted
by Sweetliberations
Summary: Quiz AU - Being Michael Q's Nanny was hard enough, living under the same roof with AJ Quartermaine and not become a cliche was going to be impossible.
1. Chapter 1

**Authors Note: No I am not quitting Not Looking. Writing both at the same time. This little sucker wont leave me alone. Yes, I know the beginning is a little awkward. I just want to jump to the good parts. I plan on this story being a little more mature. **

**This is totally AU, which I gather you all will get when you see Emily is present. Emily is Amber Tamblyn. Always will be in my mind. This is a QUIZ fic. Jason is there cuz he's a fun character to play with. There will be no Liason. Carly is going to be trashed in this one. I typically don't just go for the jugular while writing, but I need a vile-classless witch and well Carly fits. IF you are a Carly fan, yes I know this is a little out of character. YES I know there's ALOT of GH history I am fiddling with. **

**~ Three months ago ~**

"We need to talk." Breezing through the door, not bothering to knock, Emily Quartermaine fixed her older brother with a look of determination while the guard at the door sent him an apologetic look over her head before shutting the door quickly.

Abandoning the papers scattered across this desk, Jason turned to his sister knowing by the fire in her eyes whatever had driven her to drop in wasn't to check in and see how he was doing. "What's up?"

"You have to do something about AJ's shame of a marriage." Throwing her purse at the couch, Emily placed her hands on her hips, meaning she meant business.

"Why should I?"

"Because, you're partially to blame for it." Emily fired back. "If you don't I will. And we both know you'll end up having to clean up the mess I will make."

"Emily, leave it alone. AJ's a big boy and can take care of himself."

"I'm serious Jason, that marriage is poison and sooner or later Michael is going to be the one who pays. Isn't that what started all this? The reason why that blood sucking banshee is my sister-in-law? I don't care if she's your BFF, she's vile to AJ and is too busy putting the screws to him to be a mother to Michael."

It was hard to argue with the facts. "What did she do this time?"

"Oh the usual." Flopping down on his couch and putting her muddy shoes on his coffee table, Emily ignored his irritated glare. "AJ came home and found her in the bathtub with one of her flavors of the week."

It sounded like something Carly would do. "So what is it you're asking of me?"

"You helped create this mess when you were trying to get custody of Michael." Emily blasted him. "They would never have gotten married if it hadn't been the only way to keep him. Don't get me wrong, they were both out of control and I supported you. But AJ has changed Jason. Not even you can deny that."

True again. "I still don't understand what you expect me to do."

"I don't care." Snatching up her purse, her eyes pinning him like death rays, Emily marched past him to the door. "I'll give you a month."

"A month?" Knowing she was being serious about butting her nose into somewhere it didn't belong, Jason sighed. "I can't convince Carly to do anything in a month. Give me a year."

"You've got to be kidding!"

"AJ's been stuck in that marriage for almost four years, I don't think another one is going to hurt him."

"Fine, a year." Clearly not liking it, Emily gave a short nod. "At least I can look forward to only one more miserable Thanksgiving and Christmas with that shrew." With that she stalked out the door, slamming it in her wake.

* * *

**~ Present Day~**

**Help Wanted.**

**Dependable nanny needed to care for six year old boy. Experience desired. Room and board included. Occasional weekends and nights.**

"It says here that you were a Nanny for a Dr. Steven Webber for two years." Seated across from the most ludicrous glass desk Elizabeth Webber had ever seen, she opened her mouth to speak only to have the tall blonde continue one. "Any relation?"

"He's my brother."

"So you have babysitting experience?" Carly Quartermaine snidely remarked as her pen started writing something on her resume.

Licking at her lips, Elizabeth reminded herself for the third time in ten minutes to keep calm. That this job was what could save her from four years of living underneath her Gram's roof. She loved the older woman dearly, but after two weeks it was painfully clear that she and Audrey Hardy were polar opposites.

"Actually it was a little more than just babysitting." With her hands clasped tightly in her lap, Elizabeth tried to smile, but at this point she probably looked like she had a gas bubble. "My brother had a teaching rotation at the Antonio Cardarelli Hospital in Naples, Italy. He is in Forensic Pediatrics. As a single parent he needed someone there to care for his son. I was like a second parent to Cody."

Carly's lips pinched as she scribbled some more. "Did you get fired?"

The question was so out of left field that it took Elizabeth a moment of pure shock to recover. "Um, no. As I said on my resume my brother got married. I had also been taking independent classes in art, which also were done."

"So you're an artist?" Again with the snide, uncalled for attitude, which oddly enough closely resembled her parent's attitude the last time they crossed paths.

"No." Elizabeth smiled sweetly, while her insides rotted. The truth was bitter tasting on her lips, as her instructor's words echoed through her head. She had minimal talent, and had reached her potential. The one time she'd fought her parents for independence and a chance to prove herself had gone up in flames in just one simple comment.

With another annoying huff the woman looked up from the neatly printed resume. "What kind of education do you have?" Now there was the million dollar question.

Elizabeth couldn't help but wonder if there was a camera hidden somewhere in the room. That somehow her parents were behind this miserable excuse of an interview laughing themselves silly. It wouldn't shock her any to know they had a printed script for the woman currently glowering in her direction.

"I came back to the states to attend college." It was the only reason she'd returned. Her parents had finally followed through on their threat of cutting off her trust fund until she reached the age of thirty or finished college, whichever happened first. Their stipulation was she had to move to Port Charles, where her Gram's currently lived, so she could oversee her progress. It was the only way they'd pay the tuition.

"So how do you plan on being a Nanny and go to college?" Valid question, Elizabeth thought, perhaps the giant woman could dial back the attitude some.

"The ad said your son is six, I assumed he went to school during the day." Perhaps talking slowly would help the woman in front of her grasp the possibility of her doing both. "I'm only a part time student."

Because honestly, the thought of taking more than two classes made her violently ill. And if the woman followed up with "What do you want to be when you grow up" Elizabeth couldn't be held accountable for her actions.

"Well I think I've asked -." A knock at the door interrupted her and a large leather clad man entered. "Jason."

"I'm sorry, I didn't know you were in the middle of something." Looking like he was about to take a step back and leave, Carly stopped him.

"No we're finished." Her large toothy grin reminded Elizabeth of the sharks in Australia. Her smile deflated a little when he gave her a look to explain. "Elizabeth is applying to be the nanny, Elizabeth this is Jason Morgan. My brother-in-law and best friend."

With a polite nod in her direction, Elizabeth gave a half smile as she rose from her chair. "If you have any further questions my number and cell are on my resume."

"Right." Clearly not interested, Carly already acted as though she were no longer in the room. With one last nod to the large man, Elizabeth excused herself from the most bizarre and insulting interview of her life.

Waiting until the waif of a girl left Carly's office, shutting the door quietly behind her, Jason turned to look at his friend knowing he was going to yet again be disappointed.

"Nanny? What happened to Agnes?" Crossing his arms across his chest, he pinned her with a look that clearly told her he was in no mood for her vague answers.

"Agnes was two Nannies ago." Carly sighed. "Ethel left a few mornings ago."

"So why don't you call the agency for a replacement?"

"We've been blackballed." From past experiences, Jason knew when Carly said we it really meant I. What he was having a problem grasping was how anyone could get blackballed from a nanny agency. "And apparently they passed along our name to the other agencies."

"So you put an ad in the paper?" Humored at the thought and sick it had come to this, Jason lowered himself into the chair Elizabeth had previously occupied.

"I'm desperate." Carly whined. "AJ will be home in a week, and if he finds out another Nanny went AWOL he'll never let me live it down."

Again in Carly code, that pretty much meant that her demanding attitude had run off another overly qualified Nanny. There were only two reasons they went through Nannies like some people went through tissue. One was Carly's inability to show any kind of restraint when it came to the people she employed and two, Michael was becoming known for his erratic and sometimes cruel behavior to his Nannies.

"So how many applicants do you have?" Needing to know just how bad the situation was, knowing Emily would see this as another sign that enough was enough, Jason did the one thing he hated doing. Getting involved in Carly and AJ's life.

"Well I only just put in the ad." Trying to backpedal Carly went behind her ugly ass desk and fidgeted with the few papers on top of it.

"Carly."

"And I've been super busy running a multi-million dollar hotel."

"Carly, hand them over." Shoving the papers into the file folder she handed it over to Jason's outstretched hand. "There's only one."

With a dramatic sigh, she rolled her eyes. "I just told you I just put the ad in."

"When?"

"Three days ago."

"What's wrong with her?"

"For one she's too young." Carly sniffed, and Jason again translated into too pretty. "Has barely any experience."

Scanning his eyes over the woman's resume it read like a geographic map. Previous residences and schools were all over the place. Cambodia, Bosnia, Finland, Germany, Australia, Italy, the list seemed to go on and on. Letting his eyes pop to the top where her name was neatly typed out he let out a huff.

"She's Monica's ex-husband's daughter." Shaking his head, the list started to make sense. "Her parents are renowned doctors. They traveled for years to help war refugees. Recently they kept to hospitals with advanced research."

"How do you know this?" Snatching the file back she scanned over the information again.

"Because I've lived in this town my entire life." He leveled her with a glare before snatching the file back from her hands. He wanted to ask how someone who prided herself of being one of the one percent in the town didn't know that.

With his little knowledge of the applicant Jason rescanned her information, this time reading between the lines. With a smirk he shook his head. There was only one way to get Carly to see something staring her back in the face. Tell her she can't have it, or that it's out of her range. "If you ask me, she's overqualified to be a Nanny. Good call."

Through narrowed eyes, Carly tried in vain to acquire the folder only to have Jason hold on tightly to it. "I was thinking of dropping by to see Michael tonight. Guess you'll be there too?"

Her eyes still on the folder, Carly's glance flickered up. "I totally forgot. Do you think Emily would mind watching Michael for me tonight, I have an important business meeting?"

Did he think Emily would mind spending time with a nephew she adored? No. She loved being with Michael. Did he want to make this easy on Carly? Not a chance.

"She's got plans." Jason smoothly lied. "Business meeting huh? Is that what the kids are calling it these days?"

"Not that it's any of your business, but Todd and I are discussing his Lease arrangement and some changes he wants to add." Carly was a miserable liar, and had a million tells. Right now she was looking down, pretending to be busy when he knew darn well what she was up to.

"Todd huh?" Leaning back, Jason looked at her through half closed eyes. "Not the same Todd from the bathtub incident a few months back?"

"Why do you need to go there?"

"Because you're making a mess of Michael's life." Leveling her with a cold stare he was rewarded when she looked away. "Sooner or later he's going to be old enough to understand what's going on between his parents, if he doesn't already, and his behavior is only gonna get worse."

"Michael's behavior is just fine, thank you very much." Carly snapped like any other disgruntled Momma Bear who ignorantly ignored all the signs of trouble brewing. "He's just going through a phase."

"His phase involves putting food coloring in his Nannies' shampoo." Annoyed she was being so blasé about Michael's antics, Jason shot out of his chair. This was the life he didn't want for Michael. "Carly cut your losses. I know for a fact AJ's offering a great deal if you would agree to a divorce."

"He wants primary care of Michael." Carly growled, not backing down. "And I swear to you I am not walking away unless I get half."

"Of course he wants primary care, you barely spend any time with your son as it is." There were days he wish he could just strangle Carly, and this was one of those days. "He'd let you keep the Metro Court."

"That's not half and you know it!" Jabbing him in the chest with her nail, she studied him through narrowed eyes. "Whose side are you on?"

"Michael's." He answered smoothly and with no apology to her. "It's always been Michael's." Knowing when to cut his losses, Jason turned on his heel and threw out before he left. "I suggest you hire Elizabeth Webber. I doubt anyone else in town is stupid enough to apply."

* * *

"You're late." It was a great way to start a new job, having your bitchy new employer who apparently couldn't tell time, snap at you in way of a greeting. For a split second Elizabeth wondered if this job was really worth it and if the Tasty Freeze was still hiring. With a sigh she stepped into the entry way. "I will give you the basic tour, and then I need to get to work."

Looking around, Elizabeth couldn't help but wonder what drug the architect was on when he designed the horrifically tacky house. While all the other houses on the street were eloquent, with their Federalist and Tutor designs they screamed money, but tastefully so. Then there was the Quartermaine house. Basically its obnoxious Art Deco design made her want to blow chunks. She was amazed the homeowners association hadn't had a bird when this piece of . . . work went up next to their properties.

"This way." Clearly feeling she had better things to do, Carly's neck breaking stilettos clicked across the marble floor. "Our study." With a slight flick of her hand she indicated to the right. "The dining room."

Nodding to the left, Elizabeth followed her direction and nearly choked on the laughter bubbling up her throat. The odd shaped room was bad enough but the enormous round table made Elizabeth think if King Arthur, but she doubted a king would even want something so gaudy.

"Moving along." Veering to the left, they came upon a small sitting area outside of the kitchen. The glare off the chrome made her eyes water, and after a double take Elizabeth blinked at a computer panel installed into one of the walls.

"These are the stairs to the back wing." Her tone pretty much said it all. These were the stairs the little people used. The stairs she was to use while working in her home. Following her up, Elizabeth found herself wondering if the sway of the blonde's hips was normal, or had she spent hours perfecting the perfect back and forth. Reaching the landing Carly kept up her quick pace. "These are guest rooms, and . . . " Walking several more steps and around a corner Carly halted in front of a door. "This will be your room."

Not giving her chance to even take a peek, Carly was already sashaying down the hall back in the direction they had come. A few more twist and turns and they were on a landing that overlooked the lower foyer. "These are Michael's rooms." Opening a door that clearly led into a playroom, Elizabeth followed her in and stared at the chaos of broken toys heaped in piles around the room. "This is his bathroom." Walking through the Jack and Jill bath, Elizabeth found herself in a bedroom. "And of course his room."

The room was decorated by a colorblind buffoon.

"This way." Apparently not following like a well-trained labradoodle, Elizabeth blinked and found that Carly was already out of the room and headed over what seemed to be a runway hanging between the landing in front of Michael's rooms and the landing on the other side. Call her stupid, but it really didn't seem kid safe.

"These are my . . . the master bedroom." Not knowing why she would ever want to see the inside of her employers' bedroom, Elizabeth shrugged and went with the flow. Walking into the large room she nearly swallowed her tongue. There was no way a sane person decorated this house.

Inside the room was one of the most exquisite collection of Chippendale furniture she'd ever seen. A large masculine four poster bed was the focal point of the room. Its rich color made her want to reach out and touch it. The other pieces were just as impressive.

"I know it's a bit much." Curling her lip, Carly scanned the room. "But my . . . husband insisted he be able to decorate in here."

Kuddos to her husband, Elizabeth thought.

"Through here is the master bath." Again wondering why she would care, Elizabeth followed her in and felt she landed herself in the Disney land of bathrooms. The tub must have easily fit multiple people had four marble steps leading up to its base. The vanity lined an entire wall. But it was the room to the right that was a shower she would gladly die in.

Huge, marble, and with several showerheads coming from the walls, and if she was seeing right, the ceiling.

"This is my . . . our closet." Turning her head just in time, Elizabeth found herself with an armful of clothing. "Every day you are to gather my clothes for dry-cleaning. I don't trust Alice, our maid; she thinks everything can be tossed in the washer. "

And there was the reason why this rabid woman had shown her the master bedroom. "The multi media room, gym and spa are downstairs; I allow the staff to use the gym before seven every morning. Any questions? Good, I'm late for a meeting."

With that Carly was gone like a flash, leaving her opened mouth, wondering what she'd gotten herself into.

"I'll take those." A tall, slightly built older woman entered the room and smiled as she took the laundry from her. "Between you and me I know these are dry-clean only. I'm Alice."

"Elizabeth." Still a little stunned, Elizabeth found herself unsure what to do.

"I heard Ms. Carly give you the tour. Let me give you the real tour and get you up to speed." Giving her a knowing look, Alice went on. "These are Carly's suites; Mr. AJ only stays in here if there are guests in the house. Don't worry about her dry-cleaning, I get it daily and if I am in a good mood will send it off." Stepping out of the rooms back onto the landing, Alice nodded toward Michael's room. "Mr. Michael's rooms, Guest rooms, and your room in the back. I've brought up your things and put them in there for you."

"Thanks."

"You've seen the main floor." Hearing the disdain in the woman's tone, it appeared she wasn't impressed either. "Down the stairs from the main floor is the theater, bar area, arcade, pool tables, gym and spa. There's also three additional guest rooms down there. Mr. AJ has a room down there he prefers."

She had been hired to Nanny for a family in desperate need of Dr. Phil.

"Why are you telling me all this?" The older woman seemed to be nice enough. Her words lacked the gun toting disgruntled tone one would expect from an employee who was ready to explode.

"I just want you to know what you're getting yourself into." Indicating she should follow, Alice led her back to the kitchen where another woman was making herself busy. "This is cook."

The woman nodded, not making eye contact. "I have coffee perking."

"So basically while Mr. AJ is away you will be in charge of Mr. Michael. His car service arrives promptly at seven."

"He gets a service to take him to school?" Leaning against the counter, Elizabeth looked at the two women as though they were kidding.

"Only while Mr. AJ is out of town." Alice confirmed. "It also drops him off after school every day. On Mondays and Fridays he has martial arts at four. Soccer at four thirty on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays. You can use the house car if you don't want to use your own gas."

"Does Mr. AJ travel a lot?"

"Not like he used to." Alice answered. "He used to be gone a lot, but in the last two years he tries to limit the time he's away. When he is gone it's usually for a week or two. With his position at ELQ it can't be helped."

Reaching out to pick a piece of fruit out of a bowl on the counter, Elizabeth quickly dropped it when Cook looked as though she were about to stab her with a kitchen utensil.

"You eat breakfast?" Elizabeth could hear a distinctive European accent from the woman.

"I wasn't hungry, too nervous." The woman's intense glare forced her to admit the truth and she watched in wonder as the woman jumped to action.

"You're too thin. Sit down I make you omelet."

Nodding to the oddly placed table near the kitchen, Alice whispered rather loudly. "Do as she says or she'll hound you till you eat."

Taking a chair near her, Alice looked at her thoughtfully for a moment. "Mr. Michael has a hard time when Mr. AJ travels. He can sometimes be a handful-." A snort came from the kitchen. "But all in all he's a good kid."

From Elizabeth's experience whenever an adult had to explain a child's behavior prior to meeting them was never a good thing.

Feeling as though she'd been dropped down the rabbit hole from the land of the normal, Elizabeth wondered if she'd bit off more than she could chew.


	2. Chapter 2

**Authors Note: Thank you everyone for the great feedback. To answer one of the responses, yes this is gonna be fuuuun and a little down and dirty. **

* * *

**Chapter Two**

The first thing Elizabeth learned about domestic staff was that they took full advantage of the old saying "While the cats away the maids will play". In the time it'd taken to unpack her meager belongings, Alice and Cook had accomplished their tasks and had invited her down to the multimedia room for their daily dose of daytime crap.

Having nothing else to do, and feeling a little out of place, Elizabeth shrugged and decided to go with the flow. She might as well get acquainted with the two women, seeing how they were probably going to be the only allies under the roof of crazyville. So far she pegged Carly Quartermaine as being one of those rags to riches stories. Trailer Park trash somehow bags Blue Blood money. She could be wrong, though she doubted she was, but only time would tell.

If the rest of the house was a testament of gaudy overindulgence, the multimedia room was a gross display of what too much money could buy. The theater area consisted of a huge white screen, with three rows of overstuffed leather couches that reclined back. Behind the last row, separated by twenty some feet, was the bar. Three pools tables divided the space between what looked to be the adult domain and the arcade. Air hockey, foosball, and retro video games filled up the space, giving any kid at heart a mild heart attack with its promise of a good time.

A long wall of polished glass gave her a view of the home gym and spa. She'd been to public gyms that didn't have the assortment of weights, treadmills and elliptical machines her employers did. On the right hand side of the room had one of those nifty endless pools she'd seen on TV. Short, squat and pointless. As though using the pool in the backyard was too much work to do laps in. And what home spa was worth its beans without a steam room and hot tub? Extreme, absurd and pointless.

Sinking into the couch, nearly getting swallowed, Elizabeth smirked at the two women who had their feet up, surrounded by an assortment of Cooke's goodies. Trying to get herself comfortable, Elizabeth nearly jumped out of her skin when a slender man plopped down next to her.

"What have I missed?" His eyes glued to the giant images on the screen, he blindly reached across her to snag a muffin.

"Clare just told Dane she's pregnant." Alice muttered between a mouthful of food.

"She did not!" Eyes wide, he didn't flinch when Cooke hushed him. "Did he tell her they're actually brother and sister?"

"Not yet." Alice shook her head. "But Trenton was holding the DNA paperwork he snatched from the hospital."

"Get out!" The man's shock earned him another glare from the dour looking cook, which he didn't seem to feel. "Who's the new girl?"

"Nanny." Cooke grumbled.

"Wonderful to meet you." Still not looking at her, he absently held his hand out to shake.

"Reginald is the Quartermaine's butler." Alice explained.

Unable to keep up, Elizabeth's eyes moved side to side from the man to Alice. "We have a butler?"

"No the Quartermaine's do." Well that cleared things up, Elizabeth frowned. Apparently her lack of reply had Alice tear her attention from the screen to give her a glance. "AJ's family the Quartermaines lives three houses up. Reginald is on staff there."

"And they don't mind you skipping out?" Plucking a muffin from the plate, Elizabeth paused when her three new coworkers laughed.

"Mrs. Quartermaine insists on it." Reginald supplied. "In fact she creates frivolous errands for me to run so I don't miss my soap. Says it does her family some good to fend for themselves once in a while."

Mrs. Quartermaine sounded like a gem, too bad she wasn't her employer, Elizabeth thought as she tried to grasp the drama on the screen in front of her.

"I forgot to tell you." Taking advantage of a commercial break, Alice stretched her limbs and looked at Elizabeth. "Mr. Jason is picking Mr. Michael up from school today and taking him to his lessons. They'll be back around dinner time."

Listening to the maid, Elizabeth wondered if they ever stopped with the Ms., Mr., and Mrs.'s? It seemed trivial seeing they weren't in the room. On the upside she had a few more hours to kill before her job actually started.

Michael Quartermaine was not exactly what Elizabeth had expected. When the pintsized living Chucky doll dropped his bag and coat inside the front door and eyed her suspiciously, Elizabeth knew she had her work cut out for her. For an odd moment she felt as though she was stuck in some old western show down, neither speaking a word as they inspected one another for weakness.

"Michael that's not where your stuff goes." Stepping up behind her opponent, the leather wearing uncle appeared out of nowhere, and with an added look of disapproval had his nephew scampering to collect his belongings. With a silent nod of recognition in her general direction, Elizabeth watched as Michael took his coat to the closet.

With his stuff situated, Jason nodded to his nephew. "This is your new Nanny, Elizabeth."

"Nice to meet you." His words would've seemed more sincere, if they hadn't been spoken through gritted teeth.

"Go wash up for dinner." Jason's tone resembled that of a parole officer, but were affective in prompting her charge into action.

Before leaving his uncle's presence, Michael stopped and turned to the large man. "Remember you promised to stay for dinner if I behaved." Jason merely raised a brow in answer.

Alone, Jason turned her way. "I hope you don't mind, but I thought it would be easier on Michael to get used to you if I was here."

His tone implied he really didn't give a rat's ass if she minded. Not in a mean or demeaning way, but in a manner that clearly stated this was how it was going to play out. She might have been slightly offended, but with just five minutes in the child's presence she'd take all the help she could get.

"I take it he doesn't do well with new people?" Okay, perhaps her words were just a wee bit rude. But so far her dream job, the one that was supposed to give her some financial security and a roof over her head, was turning into a nightmare. She didn't have the manual of what to say when you're hired help, so it wasn't her fault if her words were out of line.

Apparently the man didn't own the manual either, because her words flowed off him like water. "No kid does well without a constant schedule and people in their lives." Touché. Words she also believed in.

"Mr. Jason!" With a wide smile, Alice welcomed their guest. "Michael said something about you staying for dinner?"

"I thought I should." His words were hard to decipher, and Elizabeth could only assume they meant one of two things. One he didn't think much of her, or her abilities and wanted to make sure she wasn't some insane lunatic. Or two, he was there to be the strong arm of the law if his redheaded nephew got out of hand. After a minutes thought, Elizabeth couldn't help but come to the conclusion it was a little of both.

"Well Cooke made Michael's favorite." Taking his coat from him, she ushered him to the table near the kitchen. "And if I remember correctly you also loved Spaghetti night."

Reaching the kitchen area, Elizabeth eyed the three settings at the table and wondered if there was another guest. Her question was answered when Alice nearly pushed her into one of the empty seats. "Cooke hates it when her food gets cold." The woman whispered into her ear before scurrying off.

"I think you'll find when Carly's not here things happen a little differently than what you would expect." Pushing up his sleeves, Jason gave her a look telling her he knew what she was thinking.

"I washed my hands, with soap." Michael announced as he took his seat.

"Let me see." Nodding as Michael put his hands up for inspection, Jason nodded. "So I hear you're going to PCU?" His question was aimed at her, and Elizabeth paused while placing her napkin in her lap.

"You're still in school?" Michael scrunched up his tiny face. "Yuck, why?" It was the million dollar question she asked herself every day. And her feelings on going closely resembled Michael's assessment.

"Michael." Jason said sternly at his nephew.

Laughing, Elizabeth shook her head. "No it's okay. I think Michael and I share the same feelings when it comes to school." Seeing the way Michael closed down slightly, she wondered if he thought she was playing one of those adult tricks by acting like their friend and agreeing with them. She'd hated it as well while growing up, her parent's friends using that fake tone and agreeing with the stupidest things. "You have to go to college to get a job."

Or at least that was the watered down version her parents sold her.

"But you have a job." Michael responded back. "You're a Nanny."

"I'm sure Elizabeth wants to be something different someday." Jason reasoned with his nephew.

Alice dropped off their food and winked in her direction before disappearing again.

Michael seemed to ponder this over as he dug into his plate of food. "So what do you want to be?"

Ah, another question she had no answer to. There was a time all she wanted to do was draw and paint. But the longer she thought about it, she couldn't help but wonder if her interest was more of a hobby that she latched onto, because she had no other direction to go. The only other thing she'd wanted to be was a Pokémon Master, but that dream had been dashed when Sarah told her they weren't real.

So she stuck to the generic response. "I don't know yet. What do you want to be?"

"That's easy." He said with a roll of his eyes as he twirled his fork. "I want to be like Daddy and work at ELQ, or work in the coffee business with Uncle Jason."

This got a surprised cough from Jason, and he reached out for his glass of water. When he recovered, he gave his nephew a slight grimace.

Over the next few days Elizabeth started to ease into her job, with the help of Michael's uncle. The man seemed to have some sort of sixth sense when it came to his nephew. Popping in out of nowhere seemed to pull Michael out of his stubborn nasty spells and make him almost compliant. It amazed her just how much could be accomplished with just a silent look or a lift of a brow.

She'd learned several things about her charge. For one he hated baths, or anything he connected to hygiene. Brussels sprouts were the enemy, not that she disagreed, and silently supported his firm stance on not eating the buggery things. He also had a world class melt down just at the suggestion he should clean his toy room, and after a bruised shin, Elizabeth quickly learned why it was the only room in the house Alice didn't touch. These were all things Elizabeth could deal with; it was Michael's absolute disrespect towards women in general she refused to tolerate.

She didn't need a PHD to know that Michael's attitude wasn't the typical little boy syndrome of thinking all girls had coodies. It went a little deeper than that and she prayed it wasn't something he had picked up from his father.

Strangely, she had started looking forward to 'break' time, as she and the other three domestics sat and snarked about the day, and the show. She could tell without being told the three had been together for some time, and her feelings were confirmed when she'd learned that Alice and Cooke had once worked with Reginald at the Quartermaine home.

As Saturday rolled around, with still no sighting of Michael's mother, Elizabeth sighed in relief when Jason made another stop by and announced he was going to take Michael to the park. Her first thought was how she was going to enjoy an hour long soak in the tub; instead she felt her heart sink when Jason asked her to accompany them. He was waiting on a business call and may have to leave from the park.

Instead she grabbed her sketch pad, book and sunscreen to keep her occupied while Michael ran off some of his extra energy. With any luck, Michael would wear himself out a little, making bath and bedtime a little less hectic.

From her position on the park bench, she watched as Jason patiently stood in the front of the soccer goal as Michael practice. Over and over again Michael would approach the ball, only to have the thing shank off nowhere near the goal. Unable to keep her mouth shut any longer, Elizabeth set aside her book.

"You're kicking with the wrong part of your foot." Her words halted their practice and Michael turned to her with a scowl on his lips and his hands firmly planted on his waist.

"What would you know, you're a girl." His harshly spoken words earned him a warning from his uncle. For Elizabeth, she'd had enough of his attitude picked up her book and pretended to read. Watching closely as he attempted another kick, she got a sick satisfaction when his foot completely missed and he ended up on his backside.

After a few more stray balls, the tiny boy stopped and sent a scowl in her direction. "What part should I be using?"

Smirking, Elizabeth absently shrugged. "How would I know, I'm a girl?" Perhaps her words were a tad bit immature, but it felt wonderful to use them.

Knowing Michael was struggling not to respond she headed over to him. "You're using your toe. If you kick with your shoestrings you have better control and can make the ball go faster."

To prove she knew what she was saying, Elizabeth swiftly kicked at the ball and sent it sailing straight at Jason Morgan's face. Almost unprepared he caught it right before it planted itself in his face.

"Let me try." Trying hard not to sound impressed, Michael caught the ball his uncle tossed to him.

"Remember, not your toe." Stepping back and watching, Elizabeth grinned when Michael nailed it and sent the ball straight to the goal.

"Did you see that?" Michael's mouth dropped, his eyes blinking owlishly.

"Very good." Putting her hands up to indicate Jason toss the ball back to her, she caught it easily and put it on the ground. "Another way is to use this part of your foot." Leaning over, she ran her finger along the inside of her foot just under her big toe. "This kick is best when you're dribbling the ball down the field."

This time she dribbled the ball a few times before drawing her foot back and kicking.

"How do you know this stuff?" Looking up at her suspiciously, Michael grabbed the ball and put it on the ground in front of him.

"I used to play soccer growing up." No matter where her parents moved their family, it seemed soccer was an international sport. She may have not spoken the language, but the sport was a great way to connect with kids her own age.

Michael still didn't look convinced, but wisely kept his mouth shut.

"Looks like you found a way to connect with him." Having reached the house and heading in, Jason fell back to speak to her out of Michael's earshot.

"So does this mean you're gonna stop playing mediator?" Tucking a piece of hair behind her ear, Elizabeth watched him from the corner of her eye. Apparently she wasn't too far off the mark, when he coughed in surprise. "You aren't all that subtle."

"Yeah." Scratching behind his ear, he sighed. "I wasn't really all that worried over the semantics. Michael has had a rough go of it, and I wanted to make sure you two got off on the right foot."

"Well you won't hear me complain." Pondering how her first week in the house of insanity could've been, Elizabeth shuddered. They caught up with Michael by the time he reached the front door, just as Jason went to open it, the door swung open and a man stepped into the opening.

"Daddy!" Flinging himself at the man, Michael was caught up by a strong pair of arms.

"Michael." Blowing a wet kiss on Michael's pink cheek, he laughed when Michael tried to return the favor.

AJ Quartermaine was not what she expected. Not even by a long shot. In her mind she saw someone more Carly like. Flashy, nasty and rude. Instead her new employer strongly resembled the man currently standing beside her, but a little taller, a little broader and boyishly charming. He was minus his suit jacket, and had his dress shirt rolled up to his elbows.

When his clear blue eyes turned in her direction she felt the bottom of her stomach give out. The easy smile that slid across his face was genuine and Elizabeth couldn't help but return it. It was that very second Elizabeth knew without a doubt she was in a lot of trouble.


	3. Chapter 3

Authors Note: Yeah this chapter is a little short and I am so sorry. But it seemed like a great stand alone. Please remember this fic is brain candy. No huge serious plots. There will be a few twist and turns, but this is, how did someone respond . . . "Down in the gutter dirty" at times. When it does get in the gutter I will change to M and give the heads up the chapter before.

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Where Jason Morgan was tough exterior and leather jacket wearing bad boy cliché, AJ Quartermaine was his complete opposite. Sitting at the dinner table, this time set for four, Elizabeth couldn't help but move her eyes from one brother to the other. With every mental scrutiny of each male she list of differences kept mounting.

The biker and business man seemed to have no difficulty finding topics to talk about. Mostly they answered the questions Michael peppered them with, but between the small boys inquiries they seemed to have enough common ground between them that there was barely a moment of silence. The fact that Jason knew about the foreign stock exchange nearly made her choke.

Both men were handsome, she'd have to be blind not to see that, and it felt cruelly unfair to the female population that AJ Quartermaine was off the market. Even crueler a woman like Carly had snagged such a find. True, she really hadn't had much interaction with the woman since her first day of work; apparently she spent a lot of time running the Metro Court while her husband was out of town.

"So Elizabeth tell me about yourself." His blue eyes swung in her direction, the exact moment she was shoving a mouthful of pot roast into her mouth. Stuck chewing a few times, she reached for her water to help swallow.

"There's not much to tell." She hated being asked to talk about herself, it left too much open for interpretation. Did he mean spill her life story? Or was it more in the line of tell me what makes you suitable to watch my kid?

"She's Jeff Webber's daughter." Jason grunted as he cut into a piece of meat.

"You're kidding." Smirking, AJ shook his head. "Small world."

Knowing she and Michael were the only ones at the table who had no clue how her father fit into the mix, Elizabeth was forced to question their comment. "Is there something I'm missing?"

Both brothers froze, staring at one another before looking at her in unison. "You really don't know?" Jason asked, his face pinched.

"Guess not."

AJ laughed. "Our Mom and your Dad used to be married."

Wow, thanks Dad for that head's up, Elizabeth grumbled mentally as she sat back against the back of her chair, eyeing the men to see if they were pulling her leg. She'd known her Dad had been previously married, but it never occurred to her to ask to whom. "Small world." It was about all she could respond with, but the next time she talked to her Dad she'd make sure to express just how she felt about being kept in the dark.

"So why's a doctor's daughter Nannying?" AJ Quartermaine looked genuinely interested.

"Because her trust fund was cut off until she went to college." Elizabeth tried to keep her tone light, and not sound like a disgruntled three year old.

"Ahh, yes. We know a little something about that don't we?" Wiggling his brows at his brother, AJ was unaffected by Jason's scowl. "Do you have any experience in being a Nanny?" Again, his tone implied he was only curious, whereas his frothy mouthed wife had been all about playing the insulting windbag.

"I Nannied for my older brother in Italy." Pausing to see if he'd belittle her, as Carly had, Elizabeth found herself mildly surprised when he seemed impressed.

"Italy huh?"

"Yeah." Playing with her vegetables, hoping Michael didn't pick up that she wasn't eating them, Elizabeth started wishing her new employer would just go back to talking to his son and brother. "I was accepted into an art program there."

"You're an artist?" Looking mildly impressed, Elizabeth really hated to burst his bubble.

"I don't think artist is the right word." Cringing a little at the words from her instructor zipped through her head. "It's more of a hobby."

"Elizabeth plays soccer." Not to be left out of the conversation for long, Michael grinned evilly as he looked toward his uncle. "She almost smacked Uncle Jason in the face."

"I would've paid to see that." AJ snickered with his son, ignoring the heated glare from Jason. After a few failed attempts to control himself, AJ snorted. "Come on Jase, that's freaking hilarious."

"Dollar in the swear jar!" Michael exclaimed, as Jason's glare turned into a vicious smirk.

"Fine." Throwing his hands up, AJ winked at his son. "Why don't you let Elizabeth help you get ready for bed and I'll be up to read to you."

"You promise?" Already scooting off his chair, Michael was already looking toward Elizabeth as though she were moving too slow.

"Well duh." AJ muttered under his breath, as Michael nearly pulled Elizabeth's arm out of its socket as he led her upstairs.

When the two were out of sight, AJ groaned and let his head drop and bounce off the table. "How in the world can that be the new Nanny? I thought it was a prerequisite for a Nanny to be over forty, have troll hair growing on their chins, and have perpetual bad breath."

"Elizabeth isn't hard on the eyes huh?" Pushing away from the table and heading toward the refrigerator, he grabbed a beer Alice kept on hand for his visits.

"Carly must be up to something." Pulling himself up and leaning back in his chair, AJ shot his brother a look. "She's trying to test me."

"I wish that were true." Twisting off the cap, Jason leaned against the counter. "But I had to twist her arm to hire Elizabeth."

"Why?" Narrowing his eyes, AJ watched Jason's expression suspiciously. "You aren't planning on . . ."

"Bonking the Nanny?" Jason supplied, his lips curving up when AJ turned a little red at his vulgar words. "She's not my type."

"She's not your type?" AJ made a face. "That girl is any man's type." Or at least as far as he could see there wasn't anything physically unappealing about his son's new Nanny.

"She's got a nice ass." Jason smirked. "And those t-."

"Stop." Knowing full well his brother was trying to push his buttons, AJ rubbed at the back of his neck. "I'll just call the agency tomorrow, see if there's anyone a little more . . . qualified."

"No can do." Moving back to the table, Jason took his seat. "It's kind of the reason you're in this mess. You and Carly have been blackballed by the agency."

"Then I call another one."

"Actually you two have been banned by all of them." Bringing the bottle up to his lips, Jason took a swig, mildly enjoying himself at AJ's expense. "Something to do with Carly being a narcissistic tyrant and Michael being a pint sized terror in desperate need of medication. Carly was forced to put an ad in the paper and only got one applicant."

With a groan, AJ slouched.

"Should I be concerned with you trying to bonk the Nanny?"

"Will you stop using that word?"

"Only if you stop acting like a sissy." Jason grinned.

"And no, I have no designs on taking advantage of Jeff Webber's daughter." Shifting in his chair, AJ looked down at the table. "I'm a married man."

"Yeah." Jason drawled. "Where is the happy Mrs.?"

"Meeting." It was code word for Carly having another play date with one of her many men. "I almost feel sorry for the sap she's . . . meeting with."

"Have you brought up getting divorced recently?" All former playfulness was absent from Jason's words, as he leaned forward and gave his brother a steady look.

"Yeah." Tossing his napkin on top of his plate, AJ frowned. "Before I left."

"And?"

"Basically she's demanding the same stuff. Half the finances and primary custody of Michael." AJ growled. "I'm past caring about the money. Hell she can even keep the house. If she should any interest in being a mother I may even be okay with her having primary care."

"Carly loves Michael." Jason interjected. "In her own way. But I agree with you, Michael deserves more." Seeing the way AJ's eyes darkened and turned cold, Jason shook his head. "Don't go there. I told you months ago I'm not going to try and take Michael from you, not now. If you go back to what you were doing before . . ."

"I've been sober for two years Jason." It was a touchy subject, and it had taken years of therapy and AA to come to terms that his brother hadn't been out to get him. Actually, Jason had done him a favor by stepping in and stopping him from completely destroying his son's life. "And between you and me, I'm not that great at scheming."

"You won't hear me arguing about that." Smirking, Jason shook his head.

"I don't know how much longer I can stay married to her." AJ admitted.

"I may be onto something." His voice low, Jason leaned forward, bracing his forearms on the table. "I'll let you know when I've followed up on a few leads."

"I don't know how to repay you." It seemed his answers had been answered three months ago when his estranged brother popped back into his life. Their reconciliation hadn't been some cheesy line from a chick flick, there had been too much bad blood between them for that. So instead of hugs and hearty slaps on the back, they settled it the way they knew how, with a lot of screaming and a few calculated swings.

After that it'd been a few weeks of bumpy roads, rough sailing and a few other over used clichés. But now their bond was stronger than ever, and AJ was comforted knowing he wasn't alone in this mess.

"Keep taking care of Michael, that's all I ask." His words were spoken honestly but the wicked gleam in his eyes put AJ on alert. "Should we hug now?"


	4. Chapter 4

Authors Note: Blah, sorry it took so long. I hope you all enjoy, this isn't my favorite chapter ever, but I guess I can't just jump to the good stuff without a little build up.

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Chapter Four

The day had started out with a shock when she awoke late with a muttered curse and a stubbed toe acquired while she rushed around her small, shoe box sized room, before hurrying down the hall to wake Michael for school. With each step she sent up a prayer the tiny redhead would be in an unusual chipper mood that morning, so she wouldn't have to deal with his sulky feet dragging attitude he usually treated her with.

Skidding to a stop just inside Michael's bedroom, her eyes widened at the sight before her. Standing in the center of the room, AJ was half dressed. His black suit pants were snug, well fitted as though he had a tailor hand make them just that morning. The white, tight fitting tank top really detailed his attributes. His hair was wet and slicked back, while a toothbrush stuck out of his mouth.

Her eyes roamed back to his broad shoulders, and defined torso. What desk jockey had a body like that? Wasn't there some cosmic law that proclaimed all corporate pencil pushers were required to have a little extra padding? If there wasn't, there should be. Or maybe the law should be all men who looked like AJ Quartermaine should not walk around half dressed near their Nannies.

Staring at one another, him shocked by her sudden arrival, her unable to tear her eyes away from his body, when the logical thing she should be doing was frantically finding the right words to say that wouldn't get her fired.

"I'm so sorry I overslept." Regaining the ability to blink, and break the staring contest, Elizabeth felt beyond stupid. Being late on the first day AJ Quartermaine was back in the house, was not a way to make her employer look upon her kindly. Eying him like he was a Grade A slab of meat was a sure fire way of being fired for sexual harassment.

"Guess no one told you." His expression easily slid from shocked to suspiciously amused, and Elizabeth searched his expression to see if she hearing him right. "I know when I go out of town things run a little . . . differently around here. Your job is not to be Michael's parent. I need a Nanny to help when my . . . when Carly and I are pulled away on business or have engagements that take us away from home and after school."

Well that was good to know, Elizabeth thought, someone should pass that memo onto Michael's mother. Still not completely sure what was expected of her while Michael's dad was in town, Elizabeth felt silly being put in the position to ask. At the same time, she didn't want to even look worse by not knowing her job.

"Just so I know, when you're in town what exactly do you want me to do?" The tops of his ears turned pink, as he choked down a cough before answering.

"Well for right now you can go back to bed." Trying for humor, AJ didn't realize what he'd said until he'd said it. To her it probably sounded like a great idea, to him it created very inappropriate images in his head. "Um, ah a-after that you're responsible to pick Michael up after school and get him to either his practice or his lessons."

She could do that, Elizabeth thought. "Anything else?"

"Basically you're in charge until I get home around six, help get Michael ready for bed, and occasionally step in when Carly or I have plans." So essentially what he was saying was she was on duty after school, after dinner time and a few times in between. It painted a different picture of her new job than the one she had over the last few days.

"Well then I'll leave you to it." Turning on her heel before he could change his mind, Elizabeth retraced her steps and did exactly as he suggested. Falling face first into her pillow, Elizabeth had no issue getting back to sleep.

When she finally awoke, showered and dressed Elizabeth walked into the kitchen and wondered if somehow she missed a turn and ended up in bizzarro land. Alice was clicking away, cleaning and buffing frantically. Every spare space was cluttered by large, obnoxious vases of the ugliest flowers arrangements known to mankind.

"Is it somebody's birthday?" Eyeing one of the tacky floral bouquets, Elizabeth made a face at the overpowering smell.

"Now that Mr. AJ is home, Ms. Carly will arrive around five." Alice's tone was downcast, as though she had to get a root canal instead of prepare the house for its owner. "She has a very particular way she wants the house."

It didn't take long for Elizabeth to catch on that she preferred not having Ms. Carly grace the home with her dominatrix style. The second she breezed through the door, she was snapping orders and throwing out insults on a whim. Her orders were ludicrous, who actually ordered their housekeeper to draw them a bath? While her tongue lashings were beyond obnoxious, it was plain as day that the black scuff marks on the marble entryway were created by the heels of Ms. Carly's own boots. How dare Alice not be ready on her hands and knees the second the prima donna returned home?

Michael seemed to regress right before her eyes five minutes after his mother returned home. True he hadn't been a halo wearing saint, but the nasty little snot he turned into was the worst she'd seen him yet. She nearly strangled the demon when he purposely knocked over one of the large vases in the upstairs hallway, then immediately blamed her when Ms. Carly came screeching out of the Master suite. He followed this up by spitting gum into her hair, of course while cleaning up the mess he'd made.

By the time six rolled around, Elizabeth had her eyes glued to the clock, and her ears searched for any sign that AJ was home to rescue her. She still had the wad of gum was still firmly lodged in her ponytail. By the time she was going to be able to get to it, she knew without a doubt there was no other option than cutting it out.

"I hate you." Michael muttered as he stood on his tiptoes and washed his hands, while splashing water over the rim to drench the counter and floor. Alice had announced dinner would be ready as soon as Mr. AJ returned home, and Elizabeth took that as her queue to get Michael ready. At this point, Michael should consider himself lucky she didn't shove his head in the toilet.

Looking at him in the reflection of the mirror, Elizabeth bit the inside of her cheek and remained silent. This didn't seem to impress the little Quartermaine all that much. "Did you hear me?"

Handing him a towel to dry his hands, Elizabeth only acknowledged him by raising her brow. She was slightly awarded by an ugly scowl.

The sound of a man's voice floated up the stairs, and like that Michael tore out of the bathroom, leaving her to the mess he created when he'd been forced to clean up. Taking the towel, which Michael had refused to use, Elizabeth tidied up the sink. It was at least one thing Alice wouldn't have to worry about.

At this point, Midas didn't own enough gold to entice her down for dinner. Not if she had to share a table with Thing One and Thing Two, instead she opted to take the safer saner route of returning to her room. At least it would give her some privacy in case she ended up in tears while trying to sort out the mess in her hair.

Not even a step out of Michael's room, she could hear the shrill yell of Ms. Carly coming from the stairs. "Nanny Elizabeth."

Closing her eyes at the thought of being called such a stupid name for god only knew how long, Elizabeth wondered if there was any way she could sneak back to her room, get her things and sneak out the window.

"Nanny Elizabeth." Apparently the Mrs. had a set of pipes on her, and instead of taking the escape route, Elizabeth moved to the top of the stairs.

"Yes, Ms. Carly." Looking down at her from the top step, Elizabeth wondered if her boss knew spray on tans only made her look orange.

"Is there a reason Michael is running around the house unattended?" Blunt, to the point and accompanied by a snarl.

"I was under the impression Mr. AJ was home."

This only made her nostrils flare like a mare in heat. "And?"

Elizabeth knew she was at an impasse. By what she'd experienced so far of her charming new boss, was the lady was out of her gourd and probably Bipolar. She doubted if she offered Mr. AJ's explanation of her daily obligations as an excuse to let the little rugrat run loose would hold up all that well. On the other hand, he had told her when he got home she was pretty much free to do what she wanted.

What was a girl to do? Apparently lie.

"I was just cleaning up a mess." A brittle smile on her face, Elizabeth waited to see how the shrew took that.

"I don't pay you to clean." Apparently Cruella De Vil forgot her barking order of cleaning up the three hundred dollar vase not an hour before. "He's downstairs, I suggest you stop wasting my time and do your job."

Watching as the tyrant spun on her six inch heels and make her way across the marble floor, Elizabeth winced at the scuff marks she left in her wake. "And don't use the front stairs."

Muttering a dark curse under her breath, Elizabeth turned and headed for the back staircase, wondering if maybe on her next day off, if she got one, she should pick up a voodoo doll. Perhaps she could acquire a new hobby, like witchcraft. There was a spell or two she wouldn't mind casting at that moment.

In no real hurry to descend to the lower level, Elizabeth was fully aware she was caught in a domestic tug of war. Unfortunately for her, she was the current tool between the battling spouses. Given her little charge's abrupt change in attitude, she couldn't help but wonder if perhaps he too had been an instrument between them. She was pretty sure she'd go postal after a few years of living under this roof.

Hitting the bottom step, Elizabeth sighed. She assumed Michael could be found in the vicinity of the bedroom Alice had indicated was the one Mr. AJ used. Knowing full well she wasn't really needed, she wondered what she could do with herself to stay off the banshee's radar until dinner time.

Wandering toward the suite at the far end of the floor, she paused when she heard Michael's laughter float through the closed door. Well at least she could honestly say she found him, but after the last few hours she had no burning desire to put herself in direct aim of the little heathen. Instead she opted to retrace her steps back to the multimedia room, when the door at the end of the hallway opened.

"Elizabeth." Pausing in midstride, AJ gave her an awkward look, as though she was interrupting his time with his son, but was too polite to say anything about it.

"I'm sorry." Making a face, and feeling like a fool, Elizabeth wanted to look for a hole to crawl in. "Ms. Carly insisted I keep an eye on Michael." Watching as he shoved his hands into his pockets, Elizabeth couldn't help but wonder how someone like AJ Quartermaine, got roped with the Queen of the Double-Wide trailers. "I know what you said this morning, but your wife can be pretty persuasive."

She almost thought he muttered something along the lines, "Like a rabid Chiwawa", but she wasn't certain.

"I'm sorry."

He was sorry? She was the one with a glob of chewed gum stuck in her hair. "I can stay out of your way." Her eyes flickered to where Michael was standing with a sulky expression on his little freckled face.

AJ, apparently caught the exchange of looks and looked down at his son. "What'd you do?"

"Nothing." Michael muttered.

When his son wasn't forthcoming, AJ moved his gaze at her. "Elizabeth?"

Oh, no. She'd seen enough movies and daytime television to know if she ratted the little punk out he'd probably retaliate by sneaking into her room in the middle of the night and snuff her out with one of her own pillows.

"I think it's best if we just keep today between Michael and I." Raising her brow a notch, she shared a silent look with the petulant child. "I'm going to leave you two alone."

Feeling good about taking the upper hand with the devil seed, Elizabeth spun on her heel only to have AJ call out to her. "You seem to have something in your hair."

Just like that, the upper hand was snatched from her.

Slowly turning back around, Elizabeth smiled bitterly. "Actually it's gum. I have no clue how it got there."

"Weird." AJ nodded, though she could see he wasn't fooled, not like she tried all that hard. "It seems we've had that problem in this house before. Nannies randomly getting chewing gum stuck in their hair."

"Guess I need to be more careful." Elizabeth responded cheekily, making sure her gaze was stuck on Michael's growing unease.

"Michael, do you have any idea how Elizabeth may have gotten gum in her hair?" Turning to his son, his tone questioning, but his eyes held that hard look every parent had when they were frustrated with their child.

"Maybe she fell asleep with gum in her mouth." Apparently Michael wasn't well versed in reading the parent look, because the only right response to the tone AJ was using combined with 'the look' was the truth.

"True." Nodding his head, while crossing his arms over his chest, AJ drawled. "I've told you that several times." Turning back to her, his face nearly comical, AJ asked. "Elizabeth, did your parents tell you not to go to bed with gum?"

"I wasn't allowed to have gum." Elizabeth smiled back. "They said it would rot out my teeth. Plus it's hard to get gum in refugee camps."

"Yeah." Nodding, AJ sighed. "I don't suppose you went to bed last night with gum?"

"Nope." Playing along, Elizabeth enjoyed watching the half pint squirm.

"So, Michael any other idea on how Elizabeth got gum in her hair?"

Face blooming bright red, Michael's mouth pinched a little, and Elizabeth wasn't proud of how much entertainment she was getting out of this. "I did it when she was cleaning up the vase."

Feeling AJ watch her from the corner of his eye, Elizabeth pretended to find something fascinating on the wall. "Go get your game controllers and your handheld. You're grounded for a month."

"A month?" As far as groundings went, Elizabeth also felt a month was a pretty long time. It was the timeframe parents used in parenting protocol when the offender had multiple strikes. If she thought Michael's face was red before, it was now bordering on purple, which clashed with his devil red hair.

"Now." In a firm voice, AJ pointed in the direction of the stairs. Waiting until Michael's stomping feet were halfway up, AJ sent her a sheepish grin. "Follow me; I have a secret way of getting that gunk out of your hair."

"Don't worry about it." Already taking a step back, Elizabeth saw his face morph from sheepish to insistent. "I was just going to cut it out. I can just keep my hair up until I can get to a salon."

"Your hair is too pretty to cut it." Shaking his head he slipped past her and headed toward the bar in the multimedia room. "No sense being stubborn, I'll get my way."

It was a challenge, and darn it, she never backed down from a challenge no matter how asinine it was. "How do you figure that?" She called out from her spot, and when he didn't answer she was forced to follow his footsteps. Spotting him behind the bar, she asked again. "How do you figure you're going to get your way?"

He was rummaging behind the polished bar, she knew he'd heard her, knew he was baiting her, but instead of just letting it go she moved closer. "I know what you're doing."

"And yet you seem to keep coming closer." AJ smirked pulling out a jar of peanut butter, holding it up to show her. "It's from my secret ice cream stash."

"You're not putting that in my hair." Making a face, Elizabeth took a step back. "I'll smell like a peanut butter sandwich for days.

"I love peanut butter." AJ defended. "And I swear it really works. My sister Emily used to get gum in her hair all the time."

Apparently her expression still looked doubtful. "Your sister got gum in her hair all the time?"

"She had two older brothers." His smile turned back into that devilish smirk that made him look way too handsome.

"Seriously, you don't have to -."

"Do you really want to cut your hair?" AJ interrupted. "I was under the impression women worshiped their hair."

And Elizabeth couldn't say he was wrong. "Fine."

"Told you I'd get my way." Pointing to one of the barstools, he moved around the bar. "Sit, this should take no time at all."

Eyeing him suspiciously, Elizabeth pulled herself up on one of the tall stools as he went to stand behind her. Feeling him gently remove the rubber band that held her hair back, Elizabeth winced when he let out a low whistle.

"He got you good." The second his fingers threaded through her hair to separate the area effect by Michael's handiwork, Elizabeth felt a shiver go up her spine. It was a secret obsession of hers, to have someone play with her hair. She loved having her hair brushed. When she was little, she and her sister used to take turns doing each other's hair.

But having AJ's large hands, delicately move her hair over her shoulder, while sectioning off the affected area, well it definitely didn't feel like her sister playing with her hair.

"I'm really sorry about this." His voice was apologetic as he moved more hair to the right; his fingers grazing her neck in the process almost had her flying off the stool. "I'd like to say he's really not a bad kid, but I think we'd both know I was lying."

"He's had his good days and his bad ones." Elizabeth answered as politically as she could. Though a part of her wanted to scream at the top of her lungs YES YES YES.

"Between you and me, he used to be worse." From the corner of her eye, Elizabeth watched as he dip two fingers into the peanut butter jar.

At this point she really didn't know what to say. There was no way she was going to tell him the truth, that the kid was a likely candidate for shock therapy. But remaining silent pretty much said the same thing. "I don't have a degree in early childhood psychology, but there seemed to be a noticeable change today. Maybe he just has a hard time with transitioning from one environment to another."

It was the nicest way she could say that perhaps going from having no parents on a day to day basis, to having both suddenly arrive at the same time, could mess with a kids head. Children weren't dumb. They knew when they were being shoved to the side. Understandably, AJ's business took him away. A lot of parents had to travel on occasion for business. But Carly had no excuse to avoid her home for the last week, or at least that's how she saw it.

"Well he must like you." Hearing the humor in his voice, Elizabeth leaned her head back slightly as she felt his fingers smearing the goopy mess into her hair.

"I wouldn't go that far." Her voice trembled slightly as his hand cupped the back of her neck to reposition her head forward.

"He put Carly's hair remover into the last Nannies shampoo."

Twisting her head to look over her shoulder, she stared at him. "He did not."

Not looking overly proud, AJ nodded. "Listen, I know this household can be intense, and you've probably picked up on how my wife and I aren't living a happily ever after life here. But Michael has gone through ten Nannies in the last year. I know he has issues, and I've been working with him to give him a stable, safe environment. I'm not pleased to say that hasn't always been so."

Turning his attention back to her hair, he started to remove some of the gum, putting the freed pieces onto the bar. "If Michael or Carly ever cross the line to the point you consider quitting talk to me first. If you can't reach me, then call Jason."

Well at least he was aware his wife originated from the ninth level of hell.

She did have doubts on how much she could actually take. Historically her temper had gotten the best of her. Mostly it was her inability to swallow down smart assed comments in the heat of the moment. In the past she'd gotten herself into hot water over and over again, by not being able to put a muzzle on her fat mouth. Whether it was her parents, friends, and even her art instructor, she just couldn't help but lighting a match and tossing onto a fire already doused in gasoline.

"I can do that." Or, at least she wanted to believe she could do it. If not, she was back to Gram's house of doilies, where her every move was scrutinized and lectured upon. As much as she loved Audrey Hardy, the woman had a gold medal in meddling and lecturing.

"Thanks." Instant relief washed over AJ's handsome features, as he turned his attention back to the mess in her hair. "Alright. Most of its out. You just need wash your hair."

"So I don't smell like a peanut butter cookie." Elizabeth joked, looking over her shoulder.

"Like I said." AJ grinned slyly. "I love peanut butter."

Their eyes caught for a moment and for some insane reason AJ's comment felt almost like some kind of innuendo to her ears.

"Here's my controllers." Nose bent out of shape, Michael appeared and dumped his arm load onto one of the tables.

Feeling as though she'd been doused by a pail of ice water, Elizabeth jumped off the barstool. Blinking a few times, she looked at the man studying her intently. "I should go take that shower." Without waiting she bolted for the stairs.


End file.
